Additionally, the group announced that from here on, its secret list of assassin-minded members will be encouraged to etch bunnies and hearts onto firearms and ammo, dissuading others from labeling them "violent" much in the same way that inflatable frog costumes denote "peaceful protests."

The arrangement is part of the fast-food chain’s new initiative: “No Kings Except Burger King.”

“This is bigger than Bennifer, Brangelina or TomKat,” said one visibly exhausted entertainment journalist, surrounded by empty coffee cups and whiteboards full of rejected name combinations. “You can’t just mash Trudeau and Perry together without serious geopolitical implications.”